Remember the Good Old Days?

You know. The "good old days" when your sister wanted to spend time with you instead of her stupid boyfriend. The days when hospitalization actually scared some people? The days when kittens were cute and cuddly instead of deadly? Those days, my friend, are over.
I'm home finally, away from the city and excited to relax. Only relaxing is about the farthest thing from my mind. There's so much going on right now and I'm caught in the middle with no way out. Things have been worse, mind you. I just can't remember when everything going wrong all had to do with me.
Before I go on, let me explain that last comment. I am not suicidal. I am not depressed. Hell, I'm not even that unhappy. I'm just stressed out. I am not the CAUSE of everything going wrong. Everything wrong just happens to be connected to me. Like the fact that I was in the hospital and now my mom is swamped with bills that we really can't pay. Like the fact that there are holds on my grades because we haven't been able to pay off the remainder of my tuition from first term. Like the fact that I need a freaking apartment now and I can't get ahold of the guy who I'm supposed to room with. There's just an awful lot that sucks right now and I'm trying to get a grip, but it's hard. A lot harder than I expected.
Wouldn't it be great if this site was up in 30 years? That way I could show my kids (if I have any) how much I went through. They wouldn't feel so out of touch with me.
I'm tired of being sick. I am tired of being confused. I am tired of being broke. And I'm tired of the stupid obsessive shopping thing I do. I tried being nice to Sister and offered a knit-along. We are going to make snowmen. I am-was-really excited. But now she's all mad at me for trying to spend time with her. I was just trying to be nice. I miss my family. I don't know how to show it any other way.
Maybe I'll call Magistra. Or maybe someone else. So many people I miss, and so much time...But none of them want to spend time with me. Maybe I should just go get coffee and write my speech. Maybe I'll do that...I don't know. Maybe I'll knit some damn mittens. That sounds good too.